It has been a while since I sat down and was at the point that I had to get out of my head but I guess today is that day. Day in and day out we see people, we know people, we take people for granted. There are people in our lives that have done so much for us and yet we let it go by as if it is their duty, we justify it by saying that we did not ask them to do it so it is on them, yet you reap the benefit. Do you even realize that you are even benefitting? Take a minute and think about if that person was not in your life. I know you can say that “I don’t speak to them so there is no loss” I beg to differ, If that person was never there, would you be or who would you be? Did they care about you or pray for you when you did not even realize it? Did they make sacrifices that you may not even know about? You may not have seen it happening but you know it was happening.

Every person that has ever crossed your path has impacted your life, either good or bad. For that I am grateful and understand that I have grown and matured. The experiences may have given you knowledge, courage, confidence at some point to guide you or maybe they attempted and you did not listen and had to learn a harder lesson. There are people that may have tried to help you over and over again yet you decided to do it your way and then blame them for how your life turned out. The impact to change the course of merely a thought, event or continuing the life you live. You sit back and allow your pride to stand in the way of doing what is right, even though you know you are wrong. You are upset because they still see you as you were, but if you changed, have you showed them the change? Are you continuing to do the same things over and over and get upset that the result never changes. Yet, that too is the fault of someone else that you did not listen. And you still do not appreciate them for not giving up on you. They get older and with their age comes sickness, and they still sacrifice and push to try to help you and whatever situation you have placed yourself in but yet the resentment is still present.

At what point do we get past it? I have accepted that I have more years behind me than in front of me, and I have been reflecting on when I lost my father and my mother and regretted that I did not see them enjoy the life they had at the end because they were worried about if their kids would be ok, They didn’t travel, go on cruises or even sit back and relax and say “I have done well” without worry. We always look at leaving a legacy to our children, family and even our friends but at what point is that legacy knowing that your life has demonstrated lessons learned well enough to live a good life, raise their families and and be proud of the person they have become. At some point it starts to feel overbearing and you feel as if everyone feels that whatever you do as you push will always be the case, “they can or will do it because they have done it before” until they can’t

Getting tired